I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Less talking, more tequila
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
