think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
