I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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