That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
