How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
