You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
