Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize