You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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