Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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