i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Randomize
