I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
The power of my boobs compel you
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
my liver is dry heaving
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
