Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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