someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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