i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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