I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize