those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
we're so committed to being not committed
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
