She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
