is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
