We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
that is very illegal...i love you.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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