My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
