im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
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