we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
