FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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