talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
She's the barista slut.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
