I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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