and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
The power of my boobs compel you
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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