Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
