i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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