No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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