Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
