And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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