she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
