Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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