I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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