i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
