yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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