I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
