Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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