i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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