i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
