remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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