The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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