I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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