Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
