ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
