yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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