i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
