That's intense
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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