I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
as a side note pls kill me
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
