thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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