Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
You need a sexual gate keeper
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
